so my big goal for myself is that I begin to say yes to more things…
well seven months ago my absolutely incredible fiance proposed and i said yes to marrying him [i should have known then that this year would be a life changing year]. i guess you could say that was my first yes.
as with most engagements there is a wedding, and with most weddings there is a dress. i absolutely love weddings, i love the flowers, i love the romance, i love the need to dress up, i love the ceremony, i love the food, and most of all i love the wedding dresses [why yes i do love to watch “say yes to the dress”]. yet when it came to my own wedding experience, dress shopping is what scared me the most.
see i’ve always been a little bigger [okay maybe a lot bigger] which meant i’ve spent most of my life wishing i was smaller. especially now that it came to weddings. i always imagined my engagement pictures looking like those beautiful brides on “style me pretty”, and following that i imagined my wedding pictures and my wedding dress, and myself to look like all those wedding beauties from wedding magazines. but i knew i had a long way to go.
so my friend and i started going to the gym together. i worked out lots for a few months i lost five pounds, then i lost ten pounds, then i lost fifteen pounds and finally i lost between twenty and twenty-five pounds. i couldn’t believe it. i had not been this small since i was in high school [and even then i couldn’t seem to place a time in high school that i weighed this little either]. one day i’ll write a blog on what weight-loss is actually like because it’s really quite interesting how the smaller i seemed to get the more insecure i felt, but thats for another day.
as proud as i was of all i accomplished i still was not as small as i wanted to be to go dress shopping or as small as i wanted to be for my wedding. but i knew i had procrastinated dress shopping as long as i possibly could, and i need to go or i would have no dress.
i was worried i’d go and nothing would fit, or nothing would fit in my budget, but i booked the appointment, then i was worried that if i invited too many people it would be stressful and overwhelming, but i decided this was important and i invited my mother, my future mother-in-law, and my four sisters [although one could not attend]. so we headed off, one of my bridesmaids was my consultant and let me tell you something, that was amazing she was so fun and it was a could break to just laugh and enjoy my time with her.
i found on this visit that dress shopping was not at all like i thought or dreaded it to be, it was fun, everything seemed flattering on me, everything was so pretty i liked everything, but nothing made me feel bridal. so i left that day with no dress… so i went to another place with just my mom and expected the same experience.
this dress experience was everything i ever dreaded. i got there and they laughed at me for my small budget [which was $1000, i know its not huge but still a thousand dollars on a dress i’m going to wear once, i think thats plenty!]. well after that they tried to find some dresses for me that were close to my budget, but then the next problem. none of the dresses fit, it was so awful and uncomfortable trying to squeeze into these dresses and then them not fitting and having to walk out and show my mom with my whole back,and butt showing because the dress did not cover anything… it was awful. actually awful. i legit wanted to quit dress shopping right then and just picking one of the dresses i found the other day.
but i had one other salon appointment booked so i went again with just my mom, although pretty discouraged and not really wanting to be there. but i walked into the cutest little dress shop and told them my budget and they said they had some that were in it and brought them out to me, they put the first one on and i knew i loved it. it was almost everything i ever dreamed of in my dress. then they told me i could make some slight changes and the dress would literally be everything i ever wanted in a dress. but i hadn’t started crying or anything yet so i wanted to try another one on. after trying on the second dress i knew, the first one was my dress. so they put me back in it and again i didn’t cry, i thought everyone had that “bridal” moment but nope, i just had a huge bubble of excitement in my chest rise up, i could picture myself at the venue, i didn’t want to take the dress off, i just knew in my heart that this was the dress, and i joyfully said… “this is my dress!”
i think for anyone who has some dress shopping coming up it’s good to know the place you’re going to. because that makes or breaks your experience. the first place, obviously having my friend as my consultant made for an incredible experience, but that won’t be most peoples experience. the truth is your consultant is there to help you and make you feel amazing about the dress you’re buying. if you aren’t having that experience. just stop. dress shopping is so much fun and hopefully it’s something you’ll only have to do once, so make sure its enjoyable.
secondly, you should definitely when making a salon appointment check to see if they fit in your budget. trust me, save yourself from an uncomfortable moment when you realize that this is just not going to work.
thirdly, know the style that the shop carries, the one that i had a bad experience at, they weren’t my style they were big, elegant ball gowns and i wanted something much more simple and romantic.
finally, don’t say you can’t wear something because of your body type until you’ve tried it on. coming from a short, slightly over weight girl, you can rock a mermaid silhouette, okay? i thought all these dresses would make me short but i found the opposite once i tried some on. i also thought because i’m more curvy i couldn’t wear mermaid but i fell in love with that style. so try on stuff because you like it, not because other people tell you thats the style you can wear. the more comfortable you are in your dress the more you’ll like it on you.
i’m sure after all of this you’d love to see a picture, but i can’t risk my love seeing it, so you’ll have to stay tuned to see out wedding pictures!